Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Today I found out our family is having a baby....

Not in 9 months, 8 months or even 7 months..but any day now. We just did not know until today.

You see one of my cousins (J) who is the youngest of our generation has been out of our lives for just over a year. It was not by our choice..he had some difficulties dealing with life, being responsible and he kind of disappeared after a falling out with one of my other cousins.

We have all tried to contact him at different times...but he does not respond. His father was my moms brother and he died in 2001. We all miss him..we are all very close and we all know how hard it was on J to loose his father. J was my uncles youngest son and his oldest son is someone we never got to meet. He was born when my uncle was 18 and after years of only receiving supervised visitation he agreed to give up his rights and allow the moms husband to adopt his oldest son. My uncle was a Vietnam vet and had a heart of gold.....he did not have any money or much of a job...but he had a fortune in love to give. J lived with his dad after his parents divorced and they took care of each other. J is a lot like him......but suffers from depression. I have seen him suffer, we all have, we all tried to help. I think that we tried to help too much. His guilt for not being what he thought we all wanted got the better of has been easier for him to stay away than to face what he fears is our disappointment.

Last night I had a dream about my uncle....I always wanted to write his story...he did not have the heart to talk about it, he said someday. Someday never came. I don't know why I dreamt about him last night it had been a long time....

Last night my other cousins oldest daughter found J on myspace and got ahold of him online. The news is good. Him and his long time girlfriend are doing well, he is working and they are expecting their first child last week.

I tried to get J to answer my email tonight after I too found him on far nothing. I hope to hear from him. I want him to know that no matter what else happens between us all ...we are family first and for most...the rest of it will be ok. The rest of it will work itself out. We love him, his gf and his child.


Blogger Michelle said...

It's never too late Kylee to write your uncles story. I know it wouldn't contain everything you'd like, but even just for your own personal self it would be a nice thing to do....i bet J would like it :)
What a loving family you have...beautiful :)

2:13 AM  
Blogger Crystal said...

maybe you can write your uncle's story by what you know and what you don't know you can ask your cousins about. it would be a great bonding experience.

10:16 AM  

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